:-o   Wow!                      :-c    Real unhappy
:-|   Grim                      :-C    Just totally unbelieving
:= |  Baboon                    :-B    Drooling
:-v   Speaking                  :-,    Smirk
:-V   Shout                     :-||   Anger
:-w   Speak with forked tongue  :-)    Smiling
:-r   Sticking tongue out       :-(    Frowning
:-*   Oops!                     '-)    Wink
:-T   Keeping a straight face   ;-)    Sardonic incredulity
:-D   Said with a smile         %-<I>  Drunk with laughter
:-x   Kiss kiss                 :-"    Pursing lips
:-[   Pouting                   :-#    My lips are sealed
:-X   A big wet kiss!           :-P    Tongue hanging out in anticipation
:-Y   A quiet aside             8-|    Eyes wide with surprise
>-<   Absolutely livid!!        &-|    Tearful
8-]   "Wow, maaan"              :^D    "Great! I like it!"
:-,   "Hmmmm"
|~(   "Someone just busted my nose"
B-D   "Serves you right, dummy!!"
|-{   "Good Grief!" (Charlie Brown?)
:-}   "Thish wine tashted pretty good"
8-O   "Omigod!!" (done after "rm -rf *" ?)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------
IBM SHARE/Northeast Regional Data Center, Gainsville, Florida/Update, 1985
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Unofficial Smiley Dictionary
--------------------------------

:-)   Your basic smiley; this smiley is used to inflect a sarcastic or 
      joking statement since we can't hear voice inflection over Unix
;-)   Winky smiley; user just made a flirtatious and/or sarcastic remark;
      more of a "don't hit me for what I just said" smiley
:-(   Frowning smiley; user did not like that last statement or is upset or 
      depressed about something
:-I   Indifferent smiley; better than a frowning smiley but not quite as 
      good as a happy smiley
:->   User just made a really biting sarcastic remark; worse than a :-)
>:->  User just made a really devilish remark
>;->  Winky and devil combined; a very lewd remark was just made

Those are the basic ones...Here are some somewhat less common ones:

%-)    User has been staring at a green screen for 15 hours straight
:-F    Bucktoothed vampire with one tooth missing
;-)    User is so happy, s/he is crying
:<)    User is from an Ivy League School
+-:-)  User is the Pope or holds some other religious office
`:-)   User shaved one of his eyebrows off this morning
O-)    Megaton Man On Patrol! (or else, user is a scuba diver)
O :-)  User is an angel (at heart, at least)
:-S    User just made an incoherent statement
<|-(   User is Chinese and doesn't like these kind of jokes
*<:-)  User is wearing a Santa Claus Hat
d8=    Your pet beaver is wearing goggles and a hard hat
K:P    User is a little kid with a propeller beenie
(-:    User is left handed             :*)    User is drunk
[:]    User is a robot                 8-)    User is wearing sunglasses
B:-)   Sunglasses on head              ::-)   User wears normal glasses
B-)    User wears horn-rimmed glasses  8:-)   User is a little girl
:-)-8  User is a big girl              :-{)   User has a mustache
:-{}   User wears lipstick             {:-)   User wears a toupee
}:-(   Toupee in an updraft            :-[    User is a vampire
:-E    Bucktoothed vampire             :-7    User just made a wry statement
:-*    User just ate something sour    ;-(    User is crying
:-@    User is screaming               :-#    User wears braces
:^)    User has a broken nose          :-&    User is tongue tied
,:-)   Same thing...other side         |-I    User is asleep
|-O    User is yawning/snoring         :-Q    User is a smoker
:-?    User smokes a pipe              :-P    Nyahhhh!
:-D    User is laughing (at you!)      :-X    User's lips are sealed
:-C    User is really bummed           <|-)   User is Chinese
:-/    User is skeptical               C=:-)  User is a chef
@=     User is pro-nuclear war         :-o    Uh oh!
(8-o   It's Mr. Bill!                  *:o)   And Bozo the Clown!
3:]    Pet smiley                      3:[    Mean Pet smiley
E-:-)  User is a Ham radio operator    :-9    User is licking his/her lips
%-6    User is braindead               [:-)   User is wearing a walkman
(:I    User is an egghead              <:-I   User is a dunce
@:-)   User is wearing a turban        :-0    No Yelling! (Quiet Lab)
:-:    Mutant smiley                          The invisible smiley
.-)    User only has one eye           ,-)    Ditto...but he's winking
X-(    User just died                  %\v    Picasso
C=}>;*{O)  Mega-Smiley... A drunk, devilish chef with a toupee in an 
           updraft, a mustache, and a double chin

Note: A lot of these can be typed without noses to make midget smileys.

:]     Gleep...a friendly midget smiley who will gladly be your friend
:)     Happy
:>     Hmm, let me think...
:D     Laughter
:I     Hmmm, not funny!
:(     Sad
:[     Real downer
:<     What pretences!
:{     Oh boy, the headmaster!...
:O     Yelling
;(     Crying
[]     Hugs and
:*     Kisses

:-`    Smiley spitting out its chewing tobacco
:-$    Smiley face with it's mouth wired shut
:-6    Smiley after eating something sour
:-*    Smiley after eating something bitter
:-p    Smiley sticking its tongue out (at you!)
=:-(   (Real punk rockers don't smile)
{:-)   Smiley with its hair parted in the middle
:-1    Smiley bland face               :-!    Smiley bland face
8-)    Smiley swimmer                  :-&    Smiley which is tongue-tied
:-0    Smiley orator                   (:-(   Unsmiley frowning
=:-)   Smiley punk-rocker              +-:-)  Smiley priest
:-o    Smiley singing national anthem  :-[    Unsmiley blockhead
:-]    Smiley blockhead                :-{    Smiley variation on a theme
:-}    Smiley variation on a theme     }:-)   Above in an updraft
g-)    Smiley with pince-nez glasses   :-\    Undecided smiley
:-/    Lefty undecided smiley          :-|    "Have an ordinary day" smiley
;-)    Winking smiley                  :-<    Real sad smiley
:-x    "My lips are sealed" smiley     :-c    Bummed out smiley
:-v    Talking head smiley             :-?    Smiley smoking a pipe
0-)    Smiley cyclops (scuba diver?)   :<     Midget unsmiley
:>     Midget smiley

:-)    Ha ha                           ~~:-(  Net.flame
|-)    Hee hee
|-D    Ho ho
:->    Hey hey
:-(    Boo hoo                         X-(    Net.suicide
:-I    Hmm
:-O    Uh oh                           >:-I   Net.startrek
:-P    Nyah nyah                       3:o[   Net.pets
|-P    Yuk

Male    :-
Female  >-